Most nights I would come home from work and watch porn on my computer as I jacked off. Needless to say there isn't much going on at night or on the weekends to get me very excited. I do, however, know one thing for certain: I’ll never look at a cucumber the same way again.To begin with I am a young single guy living in a very small town. It turned out I knew a lot less than I thought, but that’s the beauty of higher learning - the more you know, the more you realize you don’t actually know that much.
I’d always thought I gave great blow jobs, but seeing the instructor wolf down a seven-inch dildo as if she were just eating a sandwich admittedly humbled me. I left the class that Saturday afternoon feeling like I'd been taken down a few pegs.
It was nothing short of impressive, if not downright unbelievable. As I watched her take the seven-inch dildo all the way to the back of her throat three times in succession, my eyes filled with tears: partly with pride, and partly from the vicarious feeling of gagging uncontrollably. She picked up her bright, purple dildo and stood in front of us in profile. Fortunately, I was not alone, as I heard echoes of coughing noises throughout the tiny classroom.īy the end of the class, the students were skeptical as to whether or not deep-throating could actually be done. It also probably helps if you're using a cucumber and not a penis: when it was time for us to try it out, I couldn't quite apply my skills properly. No two penises are alike.Ībove all else, deep-throating requires a lot of practice and the will to succeed. Here's what happened when I went to a blow job class and boned up on going down.
At that moment, I knew that this would be no ordinary learning experience (that, plus the fact that all of the desks were strewn with bottles of lube and veiny dildos). In front of each seat was a syllabus detailing the lesson plan.
The turnout was impressive: about 18 to 20 ladies, all gathered to learn how to swallow on a Saturday. Luckily, as I walked in the room, the instructor greeted me with a massive grin instead.
Because this was a blow job class, however, I imagined a room full of women with fake dicks in their mouths, turning to glare at me mid-suck. Right before I walked in, I had a horrific high school flashback: I imagined the students' heads turning to the back of the room, the teacher stopping mid-lesson to look me up and down. I arrived at StripXpertease headquarters a bit late. If you're looking to boost your sexual IQ, StripXpertease likely has a class for you. (There's also another location in Los Angeles.) Founded in 2005, StripXpertease offers classes on everything from the art of the lapdance to how to talk dirty. The 2.5-hour class was offered by StripXpertease, an NYC-based, female-driven enterprise that strives to help women reach their highest level of sexual confidence. So when I was offered the opportunity to take a blow job class on a sunny Saturday afternoon, I was quick to sign up. That said, I firmly believe in the value of higher education. There are very few things I'm really good at, but one thing is for sure: I give great blow jobs (or so my exes have told me). I have no desire to train for Tough Mudder or any other iteration thereof, because running outside is really hard. I don't have a PhD, nor have I written the next Great American Novel.